By Craig Skinner
Overzealous parents take the life and fun out of game
Participating in youth league sports is supposed to be fun, but all too often the actions of unruly adults are sucking the joy out of the games for referees, players, and coaches alike.
Many adults are setting horrible examples for their children as they watch their youngsters in action at hockey rinks and baseball diamonds across North America.
Referees are the frequent targets of venom spewed from fans over missed calls.
Grown men and women lose sight of the fact that the men in stripes are usually just boys, working the games to earn some pocket change.
Philippe Massie, 14, quickly found that refereeing can be thankless work.
On his first day on the job with the Sandy Hill Minor Hockey Association just a few weeks ago, Massie was reduced to tears after a man who had been watching him referee an atom-level game, for 10- and 11-year-old boys, barged into the referees’ dressing room and criticized his work.
Massie quit the job, but was talked into giving it another chance by his supervisor.
But Scott Valentine, the association’s vice-president, says many don’t give it another chance.
“In Canada, 10,000 referees quit each year,” he says. “Most just can’t stand being screamed at. They figure it’s not worth the $10 per game.”
I can understand why kids who are officiating don’t like to be screamed at. I was a softball umpire for one torturous summer.
Like many, I resigned quickly. The game I loved didn’t seem as fun from behind the plate.
Parents of one player even jeered me, as I biked away, for costing their daughter her “five-pitch” softball game.
While my umpiring job was a short-lived experiment, I always enjoyed playing the sports that I loved.
The games were a blast, in part because, despite a lack of talent, I could always count on my parents to cheer wildly for my smallest triumphs and offer encouragement after any of my failures.
But today, many kids feel the pressure to be the next Wayne Gretzky or Mark McGwire as their parents scream at them for not scoring a goal or hitting a home run.
This pressure, rather than motivating children to succeed, forces many young athletes to quit playing organized sports.
Sometimes, the consequences of the overzealous acts of adults at youth sporting events can even be deadly.
Such was the case in the death of hockey coach Michael Costin.
Costin was killed earlier this year during a fight with Thomas Junta at a hockey rink in Reading, Mass.
Junta, whose son plays on Costin’s team, thought his practice was excessively rough and took exception to Costin’s methods.
The men argued, and, unbelievably, Costin was beaten to death in front of his own children and other onlookers.
At Costin’s wake, one of his young sons was so stricken by grief that he crawled into his father’s casket.
For him, hockey will never just be a game again. It will always be a matter of life and death.
Sports should never be that way for any of us.