SOAPBOX: Bush, Kerry, Clinton: Anybody but a president

Gordie Wornoff

The re-election of George W. Bush is no surprise, and it is a tremendous opportunity for American citizens to cultivate their outrage and change the electoral system. Keeping in mind the way Bush brought democracy to Afghanistan and Iraq, one must be grateful there hasn’t been any ‘collateral damage’ in this election (the electoral process not withstanding).

Kerry still stands tall and goofy, rubbing his palms, aching for one of the friendly national talk-show hosts to listen to his empty wails about a close finish and a bold contest. Of course, he stood as much a threat to peace in America over the next four years as Bush.

If Kerry had won, everyone who rallied against Bush’s bevy of wars would sleep better at night under the guise of a more peaceful America. The Dixie Chicks would go back to writing hit songs and forget all about politics.

Meanwhile, President Kerry would beef U.S. armies up to 40,000 more troops and tramp all over the same deserts looking for oil and “winning the war of ideas in Arab and Muslim countries,” as he states on his Web site.

In their pre-election debates, Bush and Kerry argued and bandied like children about who could kill more people.

The “anybody but Bush” mentality was the real problem. Did people actually think that in two-party America there is a difference between the donkey and the elephant, besides being ripe fodder for cartoonists?

Was Clinton a change from Bush Sr., a change from Reagan? Absolutely not. All were war-hungry men with cash on their minds. Eastern Europe, South America and the Middle East – all were targets of interventionist administrations. The tentacles of American foreign policy are always flexed by presidents, but it will take Bush to tip the scales.

Let’s face it, Americans hate their own freedom. There are too many petty choices – McBurger Machine vs. Super Deluxe Extreme Chevy SUV and the list goes on. Anyone with enough money can buy any variety of lifestyle choices, in the proper colour to match their custom-made contact lenses.

When it comes time to make a choice on the most influential leader in the world, two versions of the same thing is all the American people want to handle. Pepsi vs. Coke — both rot your teeth.

One must remember that the Democrats supported this most recent invasion of Iraq until it became an election issue. Clinton and his gang of thugs were responsible for the deaths of millions of Iraqis through sanctions and cruise missile cocktails. Now the people of America need Bush for four more years to fully realize that they need change at the root.

Bush needs to stay in power to polarize the country. Only then might a viable alternative to these two warmongers emerge from the ashes of four more years of war and intrigue.

So sit back, relax, and let the drama unfold – if you can handle watching Bush stumble his way through countless speeches, announcing unilateral invasions and new no-bid contracts for his gun-hugger buddies.