By Lindsey Parry
It took a long 10 years, but now Caroline can finally speak out about abuse.
She still speaks quietly and with little self-assurance. It has only been three months since Caroline (not her real name), 35, and her seven-year-old daughter moved to Harmony House, a community shelter for battered women and their children. But already she sees positive changes in herself.
“My esteem and my confidence are better,” she says. “Nobody puts you down here. They accept everything about you . . . I’m able to voice my concerns here.”
Two years ago, the staff at Harmony House had some concerns of their own. When provincial funding was cut in 1996, the shelter almost had to close. But because of fund-raising efforts by community members and corporations, Harmony House has already raised three-quarters of this year’s $120,000 goal.
Meanwhile, Caroline’s main worry is not an unusual one among abused women at the shelter: her abuser is looking for her.
But, she adds, he should not be able to find her.
“I feel safe here,” says Caroline. “Nobody knows the location, and if somebody calls, they’ll say they don’t even know you.”
Leighann Burns-Campagna, director of Harmony House, says its unknown location is one of the reasons abused women come to the shelter.
“Women being stalked need high security,” she says. But sadly, she adds, only one in five women who come for help are able to get accommodations.
Taking in more victims of abuse is an often impossible demand to meet. This is because Harmony House is different from other shelters in Ontario which take in battered women and their children for a maximum of six weeks. Harmony House, on the other hand, provides protection and counselling for up to a year.
“For many women leaving violent situations, their problems can’t always be solved in six weeks,” says Burns-Campagna. She points out examples such as custody and criminal cases against the abuser.
“Sometimes, these women just need time to rest and decide what to do for their futures,” she adds.
Burns-Campagna is the only full-time employee of three at the shelter. Before their budget was cut two years ago, there were six people on staff.
Still, she says, the community has helped the shelter forge ahead. Some people make snow sculptures, leaving a bucket alongside for people to throw small change into. Others make donations through their businesses. And fund-raising events have included a recent women’s golf tournament.
No other events are planned for the rest of the year, but Harmony House will continue accepting donations and working on grant proposals, including one to the United Way.
Regional Coun. Diane Holmes sees a need for shelters like Harmony House. She is a member of Round Table on Violence Against Women, which seeks to change the justice system.
“One of the problems is that the justice system doesn’t treat women very well,” she says. “A defense attorney may try to prove the abuse is the wife’s fault, or that she’s lying. In some situations, a woman may not call the police until she has been abused 30 times. So, shelters are very important.”
Holmes stresses a need to keep Harmony House open, to provide what she calls “alternative housing” for victims of abuse.
“Some women feel if a situation is so explosive and so violent, that they have to take the kids and leave the house,” she says. “In a shelter, they can learn about their legal rights, get counseling, and alter their self esteem.”
Caroline agrees. As long as she is safe, she is on the road to recovery. But the shelter must stay open.
“I can say that if I weren’t here, I may not be alive,” she says. “I don’t know where else you might go, where you’d feel so protected.”